>> The economy is tough right now, but there are employees out there receiving raises. Wanna be one of them? Then you'll wanna hear what professional deal maker Donald Dell has to say. As a sports lawyer and agent, he's negotiated deals for superstars like Michael Jordan and Andy Roddick. He's also the author of a new book called "Never Make the First Offer: Except When You Should." Thanks for joining us, Donald.
>> Donald Dell: Thank you, Jill.
>> So, you drive bargains for a living. Can anyone learn to be a good, or at least a better negotiator?
>> Donald Dell: Well, I think there are some things you can learn how to present yourself, and how to listen to different offers, and I think you can learn from others.
>> I think that the biggest business decision negotiation that most people encounter would be their own salaries.
>> Donald Dell: Sure.
>> Let's talk about some more specific pieces of advice you have.
>> Donald Dell: Sure.
>> So, you say do not walk into your boss's office and say, "I really want x-percent today, or else." What is the, what's the view behind that piece of advice?
>> Donald Dell: Well, like the title says, "Never make the first offer." I mean, I would much rather walk into your boss and suggest, "Can we talk about my financial situation? My salary situation? And what do you think I'm worth to the company?" and let him make the first offer. The reason you do that is not so much what the offer is, but you learn things. You learn what he's thinking. Is he really in favor of doing something? How much in favor? Is he in favor of increasing it substantially or very small? Does he, does he like you? Does he dislike you? You get a lot in that answer, what he comes back with.
>> So, this is really part of the information gathering, and that's important, because you also talk about learning how to read your boss. How to read the organization. What are you looking for there? Not just the numbers. What are, what else are you looking for?
>> Donald Dell: Well, I think, you know, for example, if you're doing a serious negotiation, you don't wanna do it on the telephone or by email. Because that's so impersonal and you get no opportunity to talk with or see or evaluate the person you're dealing with. And that's, to me, very, very important, as you say, in reading the person. Is he a casual guy? Is he a serious guy? Is he happy? Is he mad that particular moment? What are his interests? How does he... you can pretty well see, in many cases, whether the guy you're negotiating with likes you or doesn't like you or maybe he's neutral about you. You can't read that from a phone call. Unless he says something that is clear. So, I'd much rather be sitting there, looking at him, talking with him, and listening. You wanna really, remember, you never learn anything when you're talking; you only learn when you're listening. And listening is very important, in these kind of negotiations.
>> How can we help people, when they walk in to their boss or to their supervisor, get over that anxiety?
>> Donald Dell: Well, I think if you can, you wanna come in and try to be natural and relaxed, which is very hard sometimes. So, how do you try to get to that stage? I think one thing you can always do, is ask the person you're talking with about his family or his children. Everybody wants to talk about their children, at one stage or another, so if you're hard up for something to talk about, or you're nervous and you wanna relax, you wanna relax him, so you ask him, you know, "How are your children doing?" And know, before you go in there, whether he has children.
>> Right.
>> Donald Dell: That leads to a more natural conversation, which is really what you're trying to do to begin with.
>> What happens if it gets contentious? I mean, really, the boss says something that torques you off, that you just get really upset, does pounding the table ever get you anywhere?
>> Donald Dell: No, I don't think pounding the table gains you anything. I think it loses you, because it shows the other side a certain thing about yourself, emotional, what you really are dying to have or get. The first rule in any negotiation, even if it's for a used car, or if it's for a salary, the first rule, and the hardest rule, is to be able to walk away from it. In other words, to say, "Thanks, but no thanks." So, let's say you get into an argument with your boss, and he says, "We can't give you a raise except one percent, you know, because we're not making any money." And you think five percent -- I'm making up the example - five percent's fair. In my opinion, if that were to occur, I think you'd try to say to him, "Now look, I think it's probably a bad time. We're not gonna reach an agreement. Let's talk in a month." Now that really, what does that do? That unnerves the other side. It sends a message that you don't have to make the deal right now, and it really puts you in a stronger position when you get back to negotiating.
>> There's something else that you advise, which I always think about, not just in negotiation but of course in my own life, that you really should have a plan B.
>> Donald Dell: Well, a plan B, let's go back to your example of a salary increase. If you had two other offers, or two other people you thought wanted to hire you, you're gonna feel a lot differently when you're sittin' there talkin' to your boss. So, anything you can do to ascertain what other choices you might have strengthens your hand considerably, and gives you a lot of mental confidence.
>> I really thank you for this advice. For cbsmoneywatch.com, I'm Jill Schlesinger. Thanks for watching.
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