Robert Pagliarini

Your Other 8 Hours

Daydream Your Way to a Better Life

By Robert Pagliarini | Oct 27, 2009 |

One of the most popular self-help books ever written on depression is Feeling Good by Dr. David Burns. He identifies several cognitive distortions the depressed suffer from.  One of them is Overgeneralization. This is the practice of “viewing a single negative event as a never-ending pattern of defeat.” If you lose your job, suddenly you are worthless and you will never amount to anything. If you look at your 401(k) statement and you’ve lost 35% of your nest egg, suddenly you’ll never be able to retire and you’ll have to be a Walmart greeter when you’re 85 years old. When things are bad, it feels like everything is bad and they’ll always be bad.

One of the simplest, most enjoyable and most effective ways to improve your outlook and rise above the depressing headlines is to daydream — visualize a better life. In Robert Cooper’s book, Get Out of Your Own Way, he says “Brain scans show that simply imagining a complex and compelling goal will actually fire the same neurons that will be required to actually achieve the goal.” Daydreaming is definitely not just for kids. Spend a few minutes every day imagining your ideal life. You don’t have to write anything down if you don’t want to, just visualize it. Make it as real as you can.

If you want to get fancy, I recommend you DreamBoard. It’s something I’ve written about in The Six Day Financial Makeover as well as my free ebook, Plan Z, but I think it bears repeating. DreamBoarding is the process of creating a visual scrapbook of your ideal life. Why pictures? Our mind thinks and remembers in pictures. We remember faces but forget names. When we read a story, we create a visual image of the characters and the situation. The great communicators use language to create mental images. A picture can communicate much more quickly and efficiently than a word or a thought.

In addition to thinking about taking a trip to Fiji, isn’t it more powerful to also look at a picture of a Fijian beach with crystal clear water and palm trees? Does the picture improve your mood more than the thoughts alone? The added benefit of creating a collage of pictures is that they can remind you of your ideal life every time you glance at your DreamBoard.

Here’s how it works. As you imagine your perfect future, jot down what it looks like. Then cut out a picture or two from a magazine that represents this life. Take your time finding pictures that get your juices flowing. If one of your goals is to own a new Porsche, buy a car magazine or visit your local dealership and pick up a brochure.

Your ideal life shouldn’t just be filled with stuff, either. It should include things you want to accomplish and ideas about the person you want to be. While it is easier to find pictures representing tangible things you want to own, you can also locate pictures representing what you want to accomplish and who you want to be.

If you want to earn a Ph.D., cut out a picture of a diploma. If you want to learn how to play the piano, cut out a picture of a piano or of someone playing the piano. If you want to work fewer hours, take a picture of your office with a clock at 3:30PM with you noticeably absent. You can find a picture for almost anything. For example, one of the things I want to accomplish is to go on an African Safari. There are a lot of places I could have gone to get pictures of Africa, but I chose to cut out pictures from an adventure travel brochure because that was more accurate for my dream.

You can even find pictures representing the person you want to be. Do you want to become a better parent? Cut out a picture of your kids on vacation or doing their homework. Do you want to be a better communicator? Cut out a picture of Barack Obama. Bottom line, no matter what your ideal life, you can find a picture to capture or express it.

Have fun with this exercise — get creative. While it might sound slightly silly-like making a collage in elementary school — using pictures will bring your ideal life to life.

Once you’ve cut out all of the pictures, it is time to create your DreamBoard. You have a couple of options. You can either create a portable goal collage by using a three-ring binder or you could create a large poster board with pictures representing all of your goals. There is nothing more powerful than looking at a collection of pictures that represent your ideal life.

Put your DreamBoard where you’ll see it often. Invest a few minutes of your other 8 hours every day to look at it.  Think about what the pictures represent and visualize living it. Then get out there and make it happen!

(Landscape image by vsz, CC 2.0)

My new book, The Other 8 Hours: Maximize Your Free Time to Create New Wealth and Purpose is now available for pre-order through Amazon.com.

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  •  
    1

    qualitymgt04@...

    10/29/09 | Report as spam

    RE: Daydream Your Way to a Better Life

    Visualization is commonly recommended within a large body of success-oriented literature, so much so as to deem it to be a common theme. Unfortunately, it is often too readily dismissed by those who cannot perceive its significance . . . I believe to their own detriment.

    If successful and wealthy people continue to promote the wisdom of this practice as a means to achieving greater things, and those who avoid doing so continue to produce results that are ungratifying, then is it not at least worth raising the question as to whether or not this is really a 'coincidence?'

    The 2nd paragraph of this article references visualization from the perspective of the brain's physical 'wiring,' establishing that the same mental resources are engaged as are required to produce that which is visualized. One should also note that through actively exercising the mind to make the focus of visualization 'as real as possible,' one's belief system is, with practice over time, brought into conformance with the focus of visualization.

    Barring extenuating circumstances, people will not generally seek to accomplish that which they do not believe to be either likely or possible. It is equally true that a lack of familiarity tends to breed discomfort. If one should hold a desire to become wealthy, yet hold beliefs that 'money is evil' and that all wealthy people are selfish and miserable, there is inherent conflict within their thinking that virtually precludes the ability or willingness to think and act in a manner that is consistent with achieving wealth in their own life. If one is unconfortable with large sums of money and/or 'expensive possessions,' this too stands in the way of translating one's desire into reality.

    Visualization is a tool that, combined with a foundation of financial intelligence, can provide means of programming one's thoughts - and yielding behaviors - that hold promise of producing the true desires of one's heart and mind.

    If one cannot 'see' themself as the owner of a yacht on a liesurely cruise in the Caribbean, for example, then it is highly unlikely that they will need to concern themself with it happening. That which is necessary must precede the reality.

    Recognizing the relationship between our beliefs and the potential for our actions should give adequate cause for us to give due consideration to the process of visualization. Seeing is believing. Beliefs provide the basis for required actions. Visualization provides the means for us to 'see' with our minds what we cannot yet see with our eyes . . . a distinction that our subconscious minds do not make.

    Here's to hoping that someone finds this useful.

  •  
    2

    Robert Pagliarini

    10/29/09 | Report as spam

    RE: Daydream Your Way to a Better Life

    @qualitymgt04@... Excellent analysis my friend. I have been a longtime critic of "The Secret." While I think the basis premise is flawed (think about what you want and the universe will provide it), if you combine visualization WITH action, that is a recipe for success. Thanks for your well-thought response. I look forward to hearing from you again.

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    3

    DeniseCorc

    10/29/09 | Report as spam

    RE: Daydream Your Way to a Better Life

    I 100% with everything that was written in this post, esp.
    from a neuroscience perspective.; Ie., visualizing what you
    want and putting yourself *in* the scene with emotionality
    is the first step. It does fire the neurons in your brain as
    though you already achieved it.

    However there is an essential second step that few realize.
    Because you've tricked your brain to thinking you've
    achieved it, there is no external propulsion/momentum to
    take the necessary action. The imagination doesn't know
    the difference between fantasy and reality. To create the
    propulsion you must "pull yourself out of the pic" (called
    disassociation) and then put that picture into a mental
    timeline of when you want to achieve that goal.

    With doing so, not only have you fired the neurons in your
    brain. You have also planted the see in your unconscious
    mind by when you will achieve it. That creates tension
    between where you are and where you want to be -- thus
    creating propulsion and movement toward the goal. This
    second step is an absolute must to create the forward
    motivation ... without hesitation ... toward your goal.

    Denise

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    4

    qualitymgt04@...

    10/30/09 | Report as spam

    RE: Daydream Your Way to a Better Life

    To Robert I say that I too look forward to more of what you choose to share with your readers. I have enjoyed other of your posts also.

    To DeniseCorc . . . outstanding addition. Very well put and so true. Proactive incorporation of a timeline into one's crafted visualization would indeed create a 'tension' as described. I suggest only the slightest modification to said description. Combining the meanings of this tension - the resultant 'discomfort' associated with sensing the discrepancy between where one is and where one envisions oneself - and of the resulting 'forces' that move one towards their goal(s) within the thus-qualified timeframe, I suggest the meaning of this to be captured by saying that "actively recognizing a timeline within one's visualization gives rise to a compulsion to achieve harmony - a state that is consistent with the goals and timeframe incorporated within that visualization." Adding the element of time does indeed compel us to, as Captain Picard would say, "make it so."

    Great addition, Denise. Please consider my rant as nothing more than a rephrasing of what you had already said.

  •  
    5

    makkh@...

    10/30/09 | Report as spam

    RE: Daydream Your Way to a Better Life

    Wow, I learned a lot again this time happy

    I guess the key point is the self willingness to make the change for better being. Definitely visualization is just one of the methods to encourage or arouse us to move forward & maybe others have better ways which I might never heard of.

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    6

    HireNeighbors

    10/30/09 | Report as spam

    RE: Daydream Your Way to a Better Life

    Excellent information. My imagination helped me to "see" a better, brighter future --- when I was a child living in horrible poverty. I made a firm decision that I would NOT live that way. FAITH with actions makes dreams come true.

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    7

    Robert Pagliarini

    10/30/09 | Report as spam

    RE: Daydream Your Way to a Better Life

    @DeniseCorc So true! Excellent insight. It's certainly one thing to think about what you want, and it's an entirely different thing to lay down the plan of action. Thanks for your comment.

  •  
    8

    Robert Pagliarini

    10/30/09 | Report as spam

    RE: Daydream Your Way to a Better Life

    @qualitymgt04@... I'm a big believer in identifying and "living" in the tension between, as you put it, "where one is and where one envisions oneself." In my forthcoming book, I discuss this very concept. Most people are afraid to confront their gaps (difference between where they are and where they want to be), but I suggest experiencing and really feeling the gap--at least for a bit. You can't live in the gap, because that would become too depressing, but feel it. The emotion you experience will help you get off your butt and close the gap. Thanks for your insight...

  •  
    9

    Robert Pagliarini

    10/30/09 | Report as spam

    RE: Daydream Your Way to a Better Life

    makkh@... Thanks for your continued support...

  •  
    10

    Robert Pagliarini

    10/30/09 | Report as spam

    RE: Daydream Your Way to a Better Life

    @HireNeighbors If you can't first imagine it, it's very difficult to obtain it. Glad you kept the faith and kept pursuing your goals.

  •  
    11

    ah12

    11/01/09 | Report as spam

    RE: Daydream Your Way to a Better Life

    Robert, a great post. This has been a reality for me to imagine what i want and then go for it.My bigger goals of live for instance moving to another country for my masters degree,finding a better job and generally living happily have been achieved through my dreams. I have vivid imagination and often i find myself thinking of the future, this lead to imagining the things i wanted to achieve at that point in time. This gradually has turned into a habit.I fully agree with this artice,by imagining your goals makes one happy hence the next move to make "it" happen becomes relativey easy.

  •  
    12

    Robert Pagliarini

    11/01/09 | Report as spam

    RE: Daydream Your Way to a Better Life

    @ah12 Very nice. Sounds like you have already put this into practice! Have you tried using the visual "dreamboard" approach?

  •  
    13

    AShrugged

    11/01/09 | Report as spam

    RE: Daydream Your Way to a Better Life

    I would not visiualize Barack but instead the ultimate communicator, Ronald Reagan.

  •  
    14

    Robert Pagliarini

    11/02/09 | Report as spam

    RE: Daydream Your Way to a Better Life

    @AShrugged I think either is appropriate. In fact, for an earlier version of this post, I actually had Ronald Reagan...

  •  
    15

    MoneyMama

    11/03/09 | Report as spam

    RE: Daydream Your Way to a Better Life

    I think it's safe to say that we would not visualize George W. Bush! happy

    Another insightful post, Robert. Visualizing has been very important for me because I don't necessarily like writing down goals, etc. I find that visualizing them is just as powerful.

  •  
    16

    joycecom

    11/16/09 | Report as spam

    RE: Daydream Your Way to a Better Life

    Robert, totally agree with you and one of the best ways to create your best possible life is to actually do a visioning session prior to Dream Board or Vision Board Creation. Visioning is a cross between soul searching, meditation and improv -- so it's much more powerful than just day dreaming! It's been used by visionaries ranging from Leonardo daVinci to Walt Disney. To see a free chapter of the best-selling book THE VISION BOARD which shows 100 full color examples of vision boards (also called dream boards or wish boards some time) go to http://tinyurl.com/seeinsidebook Hope to meet you sometime PS Loved your story on Paranormal Activity!

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Robert Pagliarini

Robert Pagliarini is the author of the No. 1 bestseller Six-Day Financial Makeover. His second book, Your Other 8 Hours: Get More Time. Get a Life. Get Rich., will be published in January 2010. He has become a familiar face on Good Morning America and has appeared on 20/20, ABC Morning News, NPR’s Marketplace and in The Wall Street Journal, Newsweek, Money Magazine, and many others. Robert is the president of Pacifica Wealth Advisors, Inc., a boutique wealth management firm recently ranked No. 4 in Southern California. He is a Certified Financial Planner and has a master’s degree in financial services.

Robert Pagliarini

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